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Kendall "We can solve racism with Pepsi" Jenner has 27.5 million followers, and is the world's highest-paid model. But it's easy to see how she can inspire so many people. After all, she hasn't forgotten her humble beginnings as a high-profile celebrity scion. In a 30-second video teasing some kind of personal announcement, Kendall said, with genuine emotion in her voice, "When I was 14 I couldn't reach as many people as I can now. Now that I'm 22 and I have this whole thing behind me, I can speak to so many people and be like: I can help you, and it's OK. I experience it, and I'm very normal. And I understand you. I can connect with you, and try and help."

This seems like a lot of backstory for someone we always assumed was conceived in a focus group.

That clip was followed by the message "Connect With Kendall" and a date. Wow, what she going to talk about? Bullying? Mental health? Charity? Whatever it was, her own mother was telling the world that she was being "brave and vulnerable," and that her "raw story" would have a "positive impact" on countless others.

The reveal continued to be built up over the following days. Fans would be "moved," and there were vague hashtags like #changetheconversation, #authenticity, #shareyourstory, and #bethechange. Speculation grew. Was Jenner coming out about an eating disorder? About her sexuality? About a sexual assault? Holy shit, had Kendall Jenner solved the Israel-Palestine conflict?

And then finally, the big day came. Jenner was ... the new face of ProActiv, because their products supposedly helped clear up acne in her youth. Clearly a few zits would render Kendall Jenner an unspeakable monster fit only for having rotten vegetables thrown at her by jeering villagers, so what's more inspirational than shilling for an acne cream that's twice as expensive as other products with the same basic shit in it?

ProactivClearly, over-the-counter cream was the only option available to someone who can afford a golden tub.

Literal revolutions have been prompted by less arrogance. Have fun following whoever you want, but always remember that lifelong fame breaks your brain in weird ways, and most influencers would happily run you over with their sponsored cars if they thought it would gain them more followers than they lost. Anyway, don't forget to like and subscribe to Cracked!

Mark wrote a book and is inspirational on Twitter.

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